I woke this morning to the sound of one of my closest family members crying.
The cry was one of anguish, of terror and sorrow and deep pain.
It jolted me awake.
The incident was and is still being tended to.
I come to write because apart from God it is one of the only solaces I know.
So I write to process,
I write to grieve and make sense of the nonsense.
Last night I went to bed with my world intact.
Little fragments of it, as I hold it to the light,
Are all vulnerable and shattered.
It’s as if what happened triggered tremors that have been going off all morning.
I have been pondering the fragility of life.
We are as strong as an ox one day,
We can be lying broken with tattered wings the next.
What to do with unforeseen accidents, tragedy and trauma?
Our bodies, our minds are made to survive.
No time for food, or dressing in the many items we have hanging in our wardrobes,
That we have accumulated over years,
For this occasion, for that.
All at once, these things are irrelevant.
We wear what we have on as we instinctively kick into another gear,
A gear where all that matters is that we are ok.
We don’t let pain win.
We fight against it.
Then as we reel and understand the scope of what it is we are dealing with,
We battle with feeling like dust,
And that the breath of whatever comes at us could blow us away in a moment.
When we witness the emotions of trauma,
Of accidental loss,
And the rawness and depth of where we can go as fragile humans,
The world seems like a cruel place and the norm we thought we were safe in,
Quickly eludes us like sand slipping through an hourglass.
My friend lost her baby this week.
She was two days off full term.
She didn’t ask for that, nor did she see it coming.
But it’s here and now she needs to make sense of her reality.
My other friend has been battling cancer.
This ruthless disease that picks anyone it chooses and pulls their life apart.
My other friend was operated on after a brain tumour was detected in their brain.
The road to recovery has been slow.
Human life is fragile: we live in the space between one breath and the next. We often try to maintain an allusion of permanence, through what we do, say, how we enjoy ourselves….Yet it is an illusion that is constantly being undermined by change and death. Victoria Finlay
We do not know what tomorrow holds.
Today is a gift that we have been given,
We must steward it and live in it well.
We have to cry with those closest to us who are going through hard things.
We have to laugh with those who are having victories and experiencing beauty in their everyday.
It is not a time to turn our backs on those who don’t know what to do with the pain that was suddenly enforced on their worlds.
I pray this morning that those who are grieving, hurting and fighting for life or surviving traumatic injuries,
Will find peace and meaning in the midst of their storm.
We don’t let the loss win out.
Or the sadness.
Or the grief.
We rise to face it courageously,
Because that’s what we do and how we were created.
When you go through deep waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they will not overflow you When you walk through the fire, you will not be burnt. Isaiah 43